User blog:Frozina/Character Review - Amelia the Wolf

Another character review, requested this time.

Note: I know the lettertype is different D8 I saved the review in my stash because I was not done yet, and now I got the stash lettertype ;__;

Basic review
Full Name: Amelia The Wolf - 1.25 - Amelia, I like it.

Gender: Female - 1 - Moving on...

Species: Wolf - 0.75 - Not really THE species you would consider original, but it's a start.

Age: 8 - 1 - Hm...

Personality: Happy, playful, adventurous, ready for action - 0.75 - Ready for action? As an eight year old? However, I'm glad you didn't put "nice" as a trait (...I do it all the time, and I feel bad for it... really, really bad.)

Likes: Playing, battling, training, being outside - 0.5 - Eight year old will haunt you

Dislikes: Snow, blood, being hit, trying potions -  0.5 - Well, yeah, I can't expect an eight year old to like blood... and again, avoid the obvious ("being hit", if you didn't realize)

Ocuppation: Hero - 0.25 - Why not parent-annoyer

Appearence
Fur: Red and blue - 1 - Hmhm

Skin: no skin - -100 - You do realize wolves have skin... right?

Eyes: Red (Left and Right) - 0.25 - Oh.

Weight: 12 kilometers 12 centimeters - ''? - ''My weight is 8 gallons... wondering how much an elephant weighs, maybe about 4 dollars?

Relations
Relatives: Emily The Wolf (sister) Jacob The Wolf (brother) - 1 - Continue...

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Love interest: Tails The Fox (Boyfriend) - 0 - Oh noes, there are the official characters again. And this time, they're courting! Ohmigod

Backstory
<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">'''Amelia The Wolf her brother and sister Emily and Jacob were abandoned no one knows what happened to their parents not even them. '- 0.5 - ''Abandoned from what? And uh-oh, there we have the lost parents cliché.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">They have always lived in Mobius sense they were born. - 1 - Since.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Whey before Tails met Sonic, Tails saw Alex walking around Emerald Hill. - 0 - No. No no. No no no no.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">When she looked into his eyes, Tails and Amelia fell in love and started dating. - 0 - If this were in a book, I would throw it away.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Amelia's brother and sister got lost in a forest a few minutes before Tails met Amelia. - 0 - Lost siblings! Another common cliché.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Then when Tails saw Sonic and ran from Amelia. - 0 - WHAT?

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">'''Then a few months after, Tails and Amelia met again and then left Mobius for a few months. Now Tails and Amelia fight side by side trying to find Amelia's brother and sister. '- 0 -'' Another story I would not want to read.

Constructive part
<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Personality: Happy, playful, adventurous, ready for action 

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Choose a personality that fits the age group, please - same goes for likes and dislikes. You would be surprized if a 3 year old's hobby were killing people, da?

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Ocuppation: Hero

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Eight year old heroes are Mary Sues. (Looking at you, Tails and Cream)

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Skin: no skin

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Get your facts straight: fur is like hair - it grows out of hair follicles, which are located IN skin - no skin, no fur. Before you make a character, you gotta check whether you're making it's traits biologically correct.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Eyes: Red (Left and Right)

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Wolves do not have red as a natural eye colour. UNLESS she uses colour lenses, she CAN NOT have RED eyes without reason (The actual eye colour of wolves is yellow/beer.) Again, check the biological facts.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Weight: 12 kilometers 12 centimeters

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">I see you're trying to master the metric system. I guess you're 'Merican. Cannot be different. At first, weight is measured in kiloGRAMS. Not meters. Meters is length. Second, if you ment 12kg and 12g, your character has anorexia. I would expect Amelia to have AT LEAST 20kg. 12kg is like, three middle-sized watermellons. So, uhm, I guess you might be better off with putting the weight in whateveritisinAmerica.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Love interest: Tails The Fox (Boyfriend)

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Another official character. Again, avoid them... also, friendly reminder: Tails' love interest was Cosmo in Sonic X and Fiona the Fox in Archie Comics, as I can recall.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Amelia The Wolf her brother and sister Emily and Jacob were abandoned no one knows what happened to their parents not even them.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Don't be vague. Wherefrom where they abandoned? Their house, their school, their country?

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Also, lost parents is another common cliché, so avoid it. If you don't want the parents to come close to the children (because they are creepy mothe--), make them work all day, so they don't get to see the children, or something like that.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Whey before Tails met Sonic, Tails saw Alex walking around Emerald Hill.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Alright. No. Get your facts straight. Sorry to break this to you, but Tails met Sonic when he was 2 years old. Before you use official characters, which I encourage you not to, look up their profiles. You will definitely avoid... these... these things.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">When she looked into his eyes, Tails and Amelia fell in love and started dating.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">Babies don't date. Just in case you were wondering. Plus, WHY did Tails fall in love with Amelia? Tails likes the snow (as far as I know), Amelia doesn't. See? It's the simple things.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">The rest of the backstory is clear, I guess.

<p style="-webkit-tap-highlight-color:rgba(0,0,0,0);color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:Verdana,sans-serif;font-size:13px;line-height:19.5px;">

Conclusion
On a scale from Sonic the Hedgehog to Very original character, this character is very bad, but can be improved by studying some biological facts about wolves, and changing the backstory so it becomes less cliché. Again, this page will look better if spelling and grammar checked.

Dammit Wikia y u suddenly change lettertype